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Scientific Ideas From Kids

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Kids are a gift from God. Not only are they imaginative and creative, they’re funny too. The following are quotes from an 11-year-old’s science exam, shown exactly as written.

“When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire.”

“H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.”

“To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube”

“When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide”

“Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state”

“Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin.”

“Hydrogin is gin and water.”

“Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars.”

“Blood flows down one leg and up the other.”

“Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, and then expectoration.”

“The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader.”

“Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire.”

“A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.”

“Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.”

“The body consists of three parts—the brainium, the borax, and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowls, of which there are five—a, e, i, o, and u.”

“The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.”

“The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana.”

“The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have been taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat to.”

“A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two molars, and eight cuspidors.”

“The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.”

“A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.”

“Many women believe that an alcoholic binge will have no ill effects on the unborn fetus, but that is a large misconception.”

“Germinate: To become a naturalized German.”

“Liter: A nest of young puppies.”

“Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away.”

“Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky.”

“Vacumm: A large, empty space where the pope lives.”

“Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative or negative.”

“To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.”

“For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the heart stops.”

“For drowning: Climb on top of the person and move up and down to make artifical perspiration.”

“For dog bite: put the dog away for several days. If he has not recovered, then kill it.”

“For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead.”

“For head cold: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat.”

And here’s my favorite:

“To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow.”

I was involved in the launch of a science educational program recently and I saw how children responded to creative teaching.

Here’s my conclusion. While the newspapers say that Filipinos are poor in Math and Science, I say, give them the right training and they will shine.

Let the kids have fun and they will remember their lessons. Which brings me to another thing. Are we having fun in learning?

When we read the Bible, attend a small group function, or listen to the message during Sunday Service, are we still excited?

Maybe the problem is not with the teacher. Maybe it’s with us.

Go back to the Psalmist and say with him that your is for the Word, and on the Word of God we meditate day and night.

Suddenly, the whole world changes. Life becomes exciting and the passion of love and intimacy with the Risen Savior is fanned to a flame once more. Maybe this is the reason why kids know how to be happy and they are. And we adults are not because we don’t?

Print ed: 09/13


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